So you know the story of how God is healing me. Let me tell you what it took to get me there....
I had my first baby at eighteen years old. Yes, 18 (I didn't say this was a how-to blog). Ryan and I married young and had TC seventeen days after our one year anniversary. I refer to this because I can see now how my health was in line for disaster 101 even then.
I knew something wasn't quite right. But, because God works all things together for good, we had TC and we were thrilled. For years after things continued on the path of never knowing what was going on with my body. Doctors told us we wouldn't have any other children and said they weren't sure how we had ever had a baby at all. They said I needed a LOT of things and meds were always the answer. The only problem...none worked.
This whole time the diagnosis was PCOS and it looked like a big pile of misery wearing my face. I remember telling Ryan that I felt like I was trapped inside of a fat suit and couldn't get out. I hated wearing it and the exhausting frustration of feeling bad. I would count calories and run. I would eat totally fat free. I would be heavier at the end of week and cry. Doctors tried lots of times to tell me that I was depressed and just needed to treat that side of things. Well, duh. I was depressed sometimes but I didn't want a drug that would just make me "fat and happy". I wanted a real solution. Stubbornness has always been a problem for me, but this is one time that it worked out. I refused the meds. Now, there's an idea for ya.
Fast-forward and I manage to lose weight, Ryan gets into grad school, we have two girls in fourteen months and move twelve times in three years. I thought I had figured things out (health-wise). That second girl showed me I was wrong. Turned out that birth control had the opposite effect it is designed to have on me. Three times I took it makes for three children. Ha! Now, plan that!! This was really just God giving us our two girls...real quick like. It was wild and crazy and hard and I don't recommend it. But the girls are each other's best friend and giggle together everyday. That is worth it ALL.
At the end of school I was worse than I had ever been. I took care of everything but me. I stopped trying. I was tired! I said it all the time. I was so tired and bigger than ever. A new doctor tells me I have low thyroid and this med works. Wow. From there things got better. Slowly.
I still had a lot to learn. It took years, a lot of frustration and determination to never give up. I did Atkins for a couple of those years and felt better but knew something still wasn't right. Never mind the fact that Atkins products are heaped full of chemicals and Diet Coke had become my nearest and dearest friend. I have always tried to be aware of over-doing or needing anything but this one sneaked up on me. I thought I was doing something good for myself by eliminating more sugar. Now I know for a fact that the stuff is hard-core addictive and it did a number on me. If you haven't looked into the effects that aspartame has on your body....PLEASE....check it out. This one thing was harder for me to let go of than anything else.
In Colossians 3:2 it says to, "Set your mind..." and this is what it took for me. I decided that I had to act on what I knew. I knew that the chemicals I was sucking down were poorly effecting my health. But the world around me was sooooo understanding about my desire to have the thing I wanted. People won't tell you that you shouldn't be eating or drinking what you have in front of you if it is what they are having too. The difference is that your eyes are open. This is where it becomes a choice. Continue on in what is killing you or revolutionize your health. What you can't do is say that you didn't know. Set your mind!
"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind."
~ Sarah
